Fatherhood
The Healer Dad
Fun and encouraging, but learning to lead.
Healer dads bring fun, warmth, and relational connection to their families. Kids feel loved, celebrated, and emotionally safe. Healers are great at play, encouragement, and building close bonds. But Healers can also struggle to discipline, avoid necessary conflict, and fail to provide the structure and leadership kids need to thrive.
Your kids need your fun. They also need your firmness.
Healer Dad Strengths
- Fun: Makes childhood joyful and playful
- Encouraging: Builds kids up consistently
- Connected: Kids feel close and emotionally safe
- Warm: Affectionate and present
- Supportive: Shows up for kids' activities and interests
Being your kids' friend is good. Being only their friend is not. They need a father who loves them enough to discipline them, set boundaries, and lead even when it costs him their momentary approval.
Healer Dad Challenges
Weak on discipline: Avoiding the hard parts of parenting.
Conflict avoidant: Not addressing behavior that needs addressing.
People pleasing: Wanting to be liked more than respected.
Inconsistent: Rules change based on how kids react.
Leaving leadership to mom: Deferring all the hard stuff.
Your Action Steps
This week: Enforce one boundary even when your kids push back.
This month: Make and keep a rule without backing down.
This quarter: Ask your wife: "Do our kids respect me? Am I leading well?"